WHATS UP WITH GAY MAN PRETENDING TO BE STRAIGHT?
come on just stop all this drama! if you’re attracted to guys, and not girls, your gay! stop pretending, stop saying ur bisexual bcos its totally different!
it’s really simple, you like A, you don’t like B. If you go out with B when u actually like A, you’re:
1. lying to B
2. lying to yourself
3. closing out a happier future romantic possibilities with A!
4. you’re a liar, a player, and you’re playing with another person’s heart!!!!!!!!!
WHY NOT BE TRUE TO URSELF and STOP THE DRAMA and SAVE EVERYONE FROM HEARTACHES????
DUMBASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
September 7th, 2009 at 1:08 am
Whew, you sounded so outraged. Is it the guy you told me of?
Let’s see the possible facts:
A. He’s not gay, it’s only your perception
B. He’s really bisexual
C. He’s gay, just like you suspect
How should your attitude towards him be?
A. If he’s straight, then being outraged and condemning him for not being gay is just wrong. Just as wrong as condemning a gay for not being straight. A straight might have commonly-gay-traits and vice versa.
B. If he’s bisexual, then it is completely his choice whether to go with a guy or girl. He is entitled to make his choice based on his own cost-benefit situation. C’mon, everyone knows having a same-sex relationship carries all the stigma, prejudice and disadvantage in the community. Who are we to tell him which life he should walk?
C. If he’s gay. You should be compassionate to him.
Accepting oneself as a gay is really a personal choice, and it does take hell a lot of process, if ever.
He might still be hoping to live a hetero life, trying to change himself, and it is a part of the process.
It is not easy, and you shouldn’t be judgemental cursing him ‘dumbass’. The decision is really a tough one. It affects one’s whole livelihood.
You might know a gay or two who might be at a more comfortable stage. But that does not mean he must be at the same stage too. Not every gay has the same circumstances.
Try to understand the circumstances that he might have. The pressure does come from many sides:
- From family: a religious one, a traditional/conservative one, being the only child/son.
- From society: a religious/homophobic/conservative one.
- From career: an old-boys/homophobic dominated industry, a popularity-based career (such as being politician/actor).
- And from many other different facets.
If you’ve got an accepting family and environment, be grateful for yourself. You might be enjoying what he isn’t. And you’re not even gay. Be apologetic towards him instead of shunning his quest in finding himself.
I hope this insight helps.
September 7th, 2009 at 7:55 am
You should see it from the perspective of the girl. Clearly compassion is not bestowed equally among humans.
If this guy can so “compassionately” do this to a woman he “loves”, then who is he to demand compassion from the woman?
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-a-gay-man-married-to-a-woman.html
He clearly asks this to the audience: “am I doing the right thing, pretending to be straight?”
Underline on “pretending”.
It’s a whole other thing if he doesn’t realize he’s gay and he’s married to a woman.
Besides I clearly say “if you are attracted to guys, not girls”. Bisexuals are attracted to both sexes.
I hope this helps you out.